Just exactly exactly What It is want to have sexual intercourse for the First Time After Transitioning

Just exactly exactly What It is want to have sexual intercourse for the First Time After Transitioning

“I’ll never forget the time that is first had sex after bottom surgery, ” Rebecca Hammond informs me about halfway through our Skype chat. Hammond, a nurse that is registered intercourse educator from Toronto whoever quick, asymmetrical haircut provides the impression of the bleach blond Aeon Flux, talks in a sleepy, seductive tone that nearly verges for a purr; her terms accepting a supplementary little bit of vibration whenever she’s wanting to stress her point.

It’s been ten years since her procedure, and Hammond’s had a quantity of sexual experiences — good, bad, and somewhere in between — but that very first experience of intercourse having a vagina is just one who has stayed along with her.

Yet, even while she fondly remembers that blissful sense of congruity, that feeling of intimacy in a human anatomy that felt “right, ” she’s loath to provide way too much capacity to the theory that first-time intercourse is somehow transformative or earth-shattering. “Virginity is merely a social idiom for talking with purity and loss, ” she reminds me personally, and something with an unpleasant, complicated history that does not stay well together with her.

Even as we chat, Hammond shifts between these two conflicting narratives of post-bottom surgery sex. In the one hand, she notes wryly, “You’re simply putting material your cunt, ” an work that hardly appears worth a lot of hassle and introspection (“I don’t obtain it! ” she cries giddily, her sound increasing a few octaves as she laughs). Yet she can’t shake the understanding that, whether or not “virginity” is a concept that is outdated one that is profoundly linked to a cisgender and heterosexual (cishet) worldview that numerous LGBTQ+ people outright reject — it’s a notion that carries a lot of weight for many trans women. Continue reading “Just exactly exactly What It is want to have sexual intercourse for the First Time After Transitioning”